Hansard

What is domestic abuse? For many, the initial thought is that it is physical abuse or even sexual abuse; yet, for many abuse victims, it can be emotional, mental or even financial abuse. The Government might wish to look at the wider implications of abuse, and I would encourage it to look especially at the effects on children and some changes that are needed in the family court.

Who is subjected to abuse? By far the majority are women, but we must not forget that men are not excluded, and is it not sad that children are often described as the forgotten victims of domestic abuse? Children living within a home environment who witness direct abuse then become at higher risk of being abused. That can occur by physically witnessing the abuse, or even when they are being protected in the arms of their mother as she is being physically assaulted. They can be subjected to extensive emotional abuse if they are listening to what the abuser is saying and to the verbal threats. For a child’s ears to hear that their dad is going to kill them—how can that not have an effect on the child? When we think about domestic abuse, we must not forget the children, who have often been subjected to as much as the person who is being abused.

Therefore, I welcome the cabinet secretary’s comments. Domestic abuse poses a serious threat to children’s emotional and physical well-being, as it does to that of the victim of abuse. We must not forget the traumatic impact that domestic abuse can have on children who have been subjected to it.

There is a film clip, “ReMoved”, which is about a young girl who has witnessed abuse and been subjected to abuse herself. Her opening lines are:

“Sometimes someone hurts you so bad, it stops hurting at all until something makes you feel again, and then it all comes back: every word, every hurt, every moment.”

The child’s story develops and she is placed in care, which echoes the child witnessing abuse and being abused herself. Domestic abuse has a massive impact upon a child.

Many women who are able to seek help and support often have to relive the experiences with a number of different professionals. Those who seek help for emotional abuse can feel let down, because when they gain the confidence to speak out, the abuse often continues, with the partner or ex-partner claiming the opposite of what they say. Many studies show that the abusers then question the mental health of the individual who is being abused.

For many mothers who are able to leave the abuser and start to rebuild a nurturing and caring home for their children, the feeling of stability and safety can be short lived. Those same mothers who have been subjected to abuse have to attend a family court, in a court system in which no physical support is given to those subjected to abuse. They find themselves having to go into a court and sit across a table from the very person who abused them, with only their lawyer by their side. There is no one to hold their hand—a simple act that would give them the courage that they need to state, when they are asked, why they do not believe that contact between the abuser and the child is in the child’s best interests. They then have to vocalise the traumas that they have been subjected to, with their abuser sitting less than 10 feet away from them. In court, the abuser’s lawyers will argue that everything that the mother has just said is completely wrong and, once again, the abuser will be allowed to speak against the mother, leaving her feeling a failure, questioning her own abilities and feeling her fears and anxieties return.

In my opinion, the way in which family courts are run allows the abuse to continue, and that must be urgently reviewed to ensure that the courts meet the needs of the child. I also agree with Ruth Maguire’s comments about courts. The family court system should, at all times, be mindful of the rights of the child to feel safe and secure rather than be the subject of any form of abuse. Ultimately, it is about getting it right for every child—GIRFEC.

Yes, the whole process should be child focused, but for many families that are subjected to domestic abuse that is not the case. Attempts to discredit a mother during a child contact process are an indication that the father is not engaging with their child and that, in reality, the focus is on the rights of the father to have parental responsibilities for a child who has witnessed domestic abuse and, most likely, been subjected to abuse. When a case is brought before a sheriff in which it is documented that abuse has taken place, we should be mindful of the way in which the case is handled, as the manner in which mothers are questioned often leaves them feeling back in the dark place they were in when being abused.

Not everyone who leaves an abusive partner has the strength to speak out; not everyone is capable of being back in the same room as their abuser; and not everyone is in a position to feel safe to speak out. Victims who have been subject to domestic abuse have often fled a home and any friends they have in an attempt to ensure their safety, yet the court process takes no note of that.

The children are the forgotten victims when a mother does not have the strength to highlight concerns. On a number of occasions, it has been reported that sheriffs have commented that the abuse was aimed at the mother, not the child. When mothers have the strength to provide an update on what has been happening to the child, they often say that the child is reserved, lashes out, does not want to leave her mother, does not want to go to a contact centre or cries out. When the family court asks the father how they feel the contact has been, they report that it is going very well although, in fact, the child is scared to go. Domestic abuse then continues repeatedly in the family.

Who listens to that child? Who will support that child? I want the Government to do so, and I want the Government to take time to study the matter carefully.